You cannot pretend to love, you even cannot pretend to like a person. As a child we never have to pretend about our preference toward a person or a thing or vegetables… we either like it or don’t. And that’s what I love about children… they don’t conceal their feelings. They show you wholeheartedly if they like being around you and also when they dislike you.
My son adores his Papay, he wants to look like him, he wants to dress like him, and he even wants to be near him at all times. They both have these tall, slender figures and they both love Aquarium, the boy could spend hours sitting in front of the aquarium (his Papay set everything up, the aquarium, the plants, the fish, shrimps, and even the micro snails! :D) and commenting everything that is happening within the water world, “Hey shrimp.. stop chasing my fish! Ah… the shrimp is cleaning the snail! or “The red shrimp has eggs in its tummy!!” and his Papay will come close and both will stare at the aquarium. I am grateful that they could be so close, I feel incredibly lucky because the man that I love, truly takes good care of my son. In our blended family, we both strive to put our children well being first.
A family is determined by the love and respect felt by its member. I don’t think a house with all of its members shouting bad words and hate each other is a family. A father should take full responsibility to create a healthy loving family, if a man could not grasp this concept, he is not a father even though he already has his offspring, he is just a childish person, not even ready to be a man. It’s kinda ironic actually when the biological father (my ex-husband) is the one who put his ego first and neglected all of his responsibility to his child, then continue to act as if he is the real victim from our lengthy adverse and bitter divorce, but c’est la vie, we can’t expect a low grade person to act properly .. let alone to behave respectfully.
I am in a good place now, I am home now. I know I have a beautiful family. The past is in the past, I have forgiven myself. The inability of a person to grow up and move on from his childish mind is entirely not my fault.
Cheers, karin Sabrina