Today, I learned about a tibetan word: Shenpa, it has a very interesting meaning according to Pema chondron; Shenpa is an unwillingness of human beings to let go of certain thoughts, particularly those that cause us suffering.
I have this bad habit to replay all the possible words that I should have said when I was angry with a particular person. Then I talked as if I’m still in that situation over and over, unable to grasp the fact that the unpleasant event has gone and I surely have no obligation to commemorate it forever. I’m doing the Shenpa.
So starting this afternoon, I want to learn to notice this habit. I want to catch my self every time I’m doing the replay of ” I have should said this or that at the time when she made me so mad “. I will catch my self, stop the replay moment, take a long deep breath two or three times, and I’ll divert my mind to think something good about myself, such as I have been writing for 340-ish days in my blog, how cool is that etc…. Hopefully along with time and consistent practice I could eliminate this one Shenpa habit.
Cheers, stay strong in this path to be a better person,