To manage a household with a partner is difficult, meh, that is so … Tasteless description. It is an art to be able to work together with your partner. To manage a household, to keep sanity intact and most importantly, to grow – different speed is very normal, but the growth needs to happen.

An art? So it needs continuous practice then? How? When? You see… You’re doing it every day. When you live together with a partner, a husband, a wife, a soulmate, in whatever way you call him/her, you are going to get through practices and learning in every given day of your togetherness. It’s not possible to not. You enter a lifelong studio of practice. Every conversation, every disagreement, every grocery list, every unpaid bill, every shared meal, every silent evening or morning or days becomes part of the lesson.

So living together is actually an art? Clever! Yes… Yes it is. And since this is a very life-changing art you’ll ever do, please do not try it just because your social media said it’s the next milestone, or because your family pressures you to be married or just because you have this vague idea that your life will be better when you’re living under one roof with someone, that’s my love is the most twisted vague idea. Twisted? Yes. Twisted.

A shared roof doesn’t create a shared life, automatically. Two people living together for years don’t certainly boost emotional maturity. Love doesn’t magically appear because the furniture now belongs to both of you.

Living together doesn’t solve loneliness. It magnifies whatever already exists—your habits, your fears, your generosity, your patience, your wounds, and your capacity to grow.

So let’s keep this beautiful messy art as an art to master, not as a competition in life.

Karin Sabrina