What a year huh… I have no idea how I can be here. Many days I felt like I have nothing left to just exist. But somehow I still get through. Up to this day I still shed many old layers… And I’m still growing.

So some days ago I read a post (I forget where, but it said: Describe your 2025 in one word, and I can’t stop thinking about that. My 2025 is seriously tough, so tough that I cracked somewhere in the middle of the year.. And that’s when the lights finally got in.

So I think my 2025 can be described in one word with: Komorebi.. a beautiful Japanese word. Sunlight that enters through the cracks. And from mid year to December, I seem to have a new life, I am not sure how to picture this, but this post-crack- new-life  is really different. I am more able to calm my monkey mind, it is easier to wake up and rest daily, and I return to this “content” baseline regularly throughout the day.

It’s strange though… When  I chase everything I want and need ( who doesn’t need everything in life??) I constantly fall face first, endless disappointments arrive in rows, stacked in neat lines. But then, I just quit. Either surrender or just don’t care, I finally sit still and let life do whatever life wants to do with me. And this is where it all becomes strange, I feel life has been so generous to me lately. So perhaps, calm and steadiness is here all along, no need to be chased.

Merry Holiday my dearest readers, may you have time for your loved ones, may your days be filled with laughter and joy.

Karin Sabrina